I think the problem here is trying to understand what the series frames as slapstick and what the series treat as genuine issues. Inuyasha and Kagome's arguments were mostly treated as a slapstick and therefore, not something we should be taking seriously. The few problems they do have, they do manage to communicate it over.

Also I don't think Inuyasha is confused about who to pick. This is why we have episode 48, where his problem is that he understands prioritising Kikyo will hurt Kagome and tries to break things off. There already seems to be an awareness between them that they have feelings for each other (the manga makes this bit more explicit but it's not like it is not there in their actions in anime). And Kagome, who understands this and comes back, and makes the choice to stay by his side. Honestly, if he wanted to pick Kikyo, he would have gone to her side by then. He doesn't. That, by itself, is the choice he made. He does have feelings for Kikyo still but both him and Kikyo seem to understand that the time for their relationship is past. It's not something they can get back anymore. They both have more business like meetings after this point where the goal is to defeat Naraku, and also to check on each other's well being.

Just my two cents.

Although agree with you on Miroku x Sango. Love them.